Your wedding day should be one of the happiest days of your life and of course you want to spread the love so that everybody else involved with your big day has a happy day too.
However, some brides forget some basics and make their wedding more of a trial than a pleasure for some guests and participants. It may not seem possible to you, but it’s true. Here are some of the things you need to avoid doing and some of the things you need to do to make sure it’s an all-round positive experience for everyone involved.
- Your hen party. This is a classic that many brides get wrong. One thing brides can do (which was shown perfectly in the film ‘Bridesmaids’) is to organise a very expensive hen party that they expect all their friends to go on. Say you’ve organised a weekend at a health farm or a trip abroad, that’s likely to cost some girls a few hundred pounds which they may not be able to afford. They are already going to be splashing out on a new outfit for your wedding and contributing to a gift so it can come across to your bridesmaids as a bit inconsiderate to think that money is no object when you’re planning a hen do. Far better is to have a sort of two-tier hen party that you invite the girls to so that they can get involved to the extent they can afford. For example, if you are planning a weekend away, make sure you balance it out with a more simple evening out, just going to a restaurant say and having dinner and drinks together. Choose an inexpensive restaurant with a set menu which you can order beforehand so everybody knows what they are likely to have to pay. That way you’ll get more people along and they’ll be a lot happier. After all, going to a fancy restaurant isn’t the main bit it’s getting your friends together for a bit of fun.
- Asking friends and family to contribute to your honeymoon rather than gifts. Now, you may have everything you need for your home because you may have been living together for a while but some people are still quite traditional about weddings and would rather give you an actual gift than cash. Which is fine. Be graceful about it. You can ask for money towards a honeymoon but make sure you also have a list for people who want to buy you an actual thing. And be prepared for people to buy ‘off-list’ as well. It’s all fine and also, make sure you write thank-you letters acknowledging the gift afterwards. They don’t have to be very long, a postcard is fine but they do need to be written.
- Choosing expensive dress for your bridesmaids and expecting them to pay for them. In our opinion this is also a no-no. If you ask a friend to be your bridesmaid then you have to foot the bill for their dress. You could ask them to buy their shoes in a colour which you can specify but not their dress. Which may mean you will have to rethink the number of bridesmaids you’re going to have? Chances are your bridesmaids won’t wear their dress again so it’s not really on to get them to expect to pay for it. But they might wear the shoes again if they’re allowed to choose them.
- Having a paying bar in the evening. We always feel a bit sorry for wedding guests who are invited to just the evening do who don’t get fed and then are expected to pay for their own drinks. It must make them wonder what exactly they have been invited to. So you’ll have to consider including in your budget to feed evening guests and to supply some drinks too. It’s just the way it is. By all means, later in the evening you can have a cash bar but you need to supplement that with drinks on the house.
- Letting your in-laws get involved. Now your future mother-in-law might not be your favourite person in the world but you need to have as good a relationship with her as possible. Of course you might not want her to be involved in your wedding planning and be wary of her ‘taking over’. The best thing to do is to give her a particular job so that she feels part of the proceedings. Maybe ask her to come with you when you are visiting florists or checking over the venue. Your other half will appreciate this and your relationship will almost certainly be better as a result. Remember that if she doesn’t have daughters of her own then she will never get a chance to plan a wedding so let her do something to help her with yours. It’s a good idea to discuss what that might be with your husband-to-be.
- Don’t endlessly discuss your wedding decor flowers, dresses, food and the like with your bridesmaids and friends. First off, there are meant to be a few surprises. Secondly, they might not have much experience of wedding planning so may not be able to give you the best advice. Thirdly, that’s where our experienced wedding stylists will be able to help you. You can talk to them as much as you like about the look you have in mind and how you feel you can create it. They’ll be just as excited as you are to chat about it and more importantly, they have masses of experiences so you can get the dream look you want without you having to put in the man hours to do it. So get in touch today for a no obligation chat and see how we can help.